Skip to main content

Why searching information online might be doing me more harm than good

As much as I have come to depend on technology providing instant access to information, I sometimes wonder if it's causing me harm when it comes to OCD.

I mentioned in a previous post that I have a great fear of forgetting things -- people's names, common facts, it runs the gamut. When I can't recall something, I go into a panic. Breathing becomes more difficult. My mind spins into thoughts of dementia.

I'm sure many, if not most, therapists would tell me to sit with that discomfort of not remembering as a means of exposure therapy. Sit with it as it diminishes, and then ultimately, the hope is, I become desensitized to it and it holds no power.

I agree with that approach.

But so many times, now, as I sit with the anxiety of forgetting something I know it's just a Google search away. And more times than not, I take the 20 seconds and find the answer online.

What was the name of the actor who starred in that movie? Check with Google.

What band was it that played that great tune? Check with Google.

I could sit with the anxiety -- and I really know I should. But often I give in to the easy access of information.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

OCD's musical mind games

Most everyone gets a song stuck in their head now and then. I certainly do. But recently OCD has gotten involved and it's turned from a simple annoyance to something of a concern. I realize this is one of those things that the general population isn't going to fully understand -- I think you need to have OCD or another form of anxiety to get it -- but I feel pretty safe talking about it here. It sounds like I'm joking, but here goes: For about the past month, I'd say way more than half the time I wake up in the morning I have Wham's "Careless Whisper" going through my head -- instantly. "I'm never gonna dance again, Guilty feet have got no rhythm ... Should have known better than to cheat a friend." Just those words. I admit, this sounds funny. The scary thing is I don't hear this song enough, if ever these days, for it to be so stuck in my head. It was never a favorite song of mine either. I didn't NOT like it, I just never s...
Post a Comment
Read more

OCD, just like my dad

My father used to collect soap. I don't think he meant to, but I remember as a child, walking into my parents' bathroom and seeing a pile, a heap, of used bars of soap on his side of the counter. It didn't strike me as strange, so much, as it did unique. I never asked why there was so much soap -- why he didn't just finish off one bar before starting another -- but I probably wondered. In recent years there have been studies on whether OCD has a genetic component. I've been involved in a couple. But to me, there's no question, now, looking back with more knowledge, that my father's pile of soap was a sign of obsessive-compulsive disorder. My belief is that once he used a bar of soap for what his OCD brain told him was the "right" amount of time, it was time to move on to the next. Maybe OCD told him the old bar was no longer clean. Or maybe it just felt "wrong." My father was interesting in that he would shower just once a wee...
Post a Comment
Read more

Sneaking in rituals, so no one can see

When I'm around people I still have OCD, I just find ways of hiding it -- or more precisely -- of doing my obsessions and compulsions in ways that aren't so obvious. At work, I have a desk in the corner of the room that faces a wall. It seemed weird at first, but then it was somehow comforting. I now think it gives me a sense of privacy -- kind of having my own office, without the door. At my desk I do have my OCD moments -- counting, staring at things, praying and then of course sometimes hitting myself in the head to get certain compulsions to stop. As much as I think someone must have seen me do this, it's actually quite possible they haven't. I'm kind of an OCD ninja, or an OCD magician -- now you see it, now you don't. Did you see me do something compulsive? No? But I did, and right in front of you. At home I sneak my obsessive routines in when no one is looking -- praying, touching things a certain number of times, looking at things, showering and ...
Post a Comment
Read more